When I stopped drinking, I had no idea how much my life would change. How much I would change. I thought that, more or less, life would go on as it always had, just with a different drink in hand. Oh man, how wrong was I…
Likes and don´t likes
First of all, apparently, being a non-drinker teaches you what you like and don’t like! I have noticed that there are things I stopped doing because they don’t actually make me happy. You won´t see me in any bars or clubs at night (or even late afternoon for that matter) or doing a lot of group things. I realised I’m more of a one-on-one person, and am a lot more introverted than I thought I was. I value spending time by myself.
No more social meet-ups in which drinking is the main factor and yes to more fun activities! Things I love doing and am doing a lot, since being a non-drinker, are: playing Padel tennis, going out for coffee and lunches (with a friend or alone), shopping/wandering through town, going to the cinema, making alcohol-free cocktails at home, reading (quit lit), pottering around the house, watching TV, chilling at home and immersing myself in the world of sobriety.
I started to use this new self-knowledge to create my own happiness by designing my life around these discoveries!
Me, the non-drinker
Another big change now I´m a non-drinker is the way I feel inside. I am calmer, more grounded and more understanding towards others. I´m not saying I turned into a Buddha or anything but I’m definitely more spiritually orientated. I’m into meditation now, (guided) breathing and yoga – Which are things that the old me would have scoffed at. I even started taking cold showers on a daily basis!! Read more about those here…
I don’t know if you used to use alcohol as a social elixir but I sure did. I think I´m wired a bit different than some, and that realisation would disappear quickly after a few drinks. Socially awkward? Yep! But poof, gone too after a couple of glasses! However, since the crutch of alcohol is gone, I realised that the more uncomfortable social situations I get myself into, and through!, the more confidence I´m getting and the more I grow into the real me. And that is starting to feel ok. Or even more than ok, my self-confidence is starting to flourish! (Random thought: How amazing would it be if we all could be 100% us, at all times? I´d love that)
Happy Wife Happy Life
I realise that everything I wrote here today is very self-focused. HOWEVER, I´m loving my wondrous life as a non-drinker and hope to radiate some of this to others around me as, in my opinion, the world could do with a less alco-centred culture. Plus… Happy Wife Happy Life, haha, so me being a non-drinker isn´t a bad thing for my man either 😉 Plus I want to be a positive, sober role model for our (now twelve-year-old) daughter. Show her that life can be amazing, full, fun and complete without alcohol. To show her fun is in people, activities & within yourself – not in alcohol❤️
Anywayzzz, I would like to conclude today’s blog with a few tips for life after drinking…!
1. Don´t be scared of change
Your life will inevitably change and although it can feel daunting at the beginning, it will all fall into place. Maybe your hobbies will look different and some of your friendships will shift, but that’s all ok. People are meant to change and evolve in life.
2. Find your people
A lot of the work to become and stay sober comes from within. However, in my experience, true joy and fun in sobriety are found when you connect. Connect with people that are on the same path. Since there weren’t many of those around in my social circle I dived into my laptop and found amazing online sober communities, from which my personal favourite is Instagram. From there on I expanded my sober circle, also IRL (in real life) bit by bit. Connection makes you feel like you belong again, and that´s hard in the alco-centric world that we live in!
3. Stay true to yourself
Stay true to yourself. There will be so many difficult moments in which you need to make decisions. Small ones, “Do I attend that party?, and bigger ones: “Do I say yes to that job offer?”. In those moments, always choose you. Do what makes you feel good and what keeps your sobriety or lifestyle choice safe. Because in the long run, that´s what makes us happy and keeps us evolving into our true selves.
