Written by Yliana Hernandez
The Early Years: When Partying Became Normal
My relationship with alcohol began at fifteen, during my high school years when weekend benders became my routine. I lived a double life—partying hard from Friday to Sunday, then pulling myself together enough during the week to maintain passing grades. It felt normal, even necessary.
During my senior year, I met the man who would become my husband. We married just one year after I graduated, and our wedding was exactly what you’d expect from two people who had normalized heavy drinking—a complete drunk fest. But something unexpected happened when we moved to San Diego: the drinking stopped, almost naturally.
The Calm Before the Storm
For several years, life felt balanced. We welcomed our first child in 1998, followed by our second in 2000. During this period, alcohol simply wasn’t part of our daily routine. Looking back, those were some of the clearest, most present years of my life, though I didn’t realize it at the time.
The Slippery Slope Back
Around 2004, alcohol quietly crept back into our lives. What started as casual weekend drinking gradually became our new normal. Tequila was my poison of choice then, and I convinced myself that limiting it to weekends made it acceptable.
Everything changed in 2008 when we decided to relocate to Chicago, seeking a change of scenery from California. That move marked the beginning of my most dangerous relationship with alcohol yet.
The Wine Lie
In Chicago, I made what I thought was a healthier choice—I switched from hard liquor to wine. I’d heard that wine was good for your heart, so surely this was an improvement, right? This rationalization became my downfall.
It started innocently enough with one glass each night. Then two. Then entire bottles. Sometimes two bottles in a single evening. When regular wine stopped giving me the effect I craved, I graduated to higher-proof varieties, jumping from 11% to 15.5% alcohol content. I was no longer drinking “grape juice,” as I dismissively called lower-proof wines.
Here we go
In 2022, we packed up our lives again and moved to Arizona, a place we’d fallen in love with during a 2018 visit. But even in this beautiful new setting, my drinking had reached dangerous levels.
My body began sending clear distress signals. I was diagnosed with hypertension and exercise-induced high blood pressure. I knew something had to change, so I started hiking, drastically cut my salt intake, and began intermittent fasting again. But I still couldn’t let go of the alcohol.
The physical symptoms became impossible to ignore. I’d wake up regurgitating wine from the night before. Blackouts became a nightly occurrence. My body was so swollen that doctors prescribed water pills. The person staring back at me in the mirror was a stranger.
The Moderation Myth
By December 2023, I convinced myself that moderation was the answer. I bought books, created rules, and made promises to myself: only weekends, no hard liquor, maximum one bottle of wine when I did drink.
But rules without control are meaningless, and I had no control. The emotional pain of constantly struggling to keep alcohol in my life while trying to moderate was exhausting. This internal battle continued for eight long months.
The Final Straw
August 10, 2024, will forever be etched in my memory. My husband and I went to a hangar for dinner, and I had privately decided not to drink. But when the waitress approached our table, the first words out of my mouth were, “I’ll take an IPA, please.”
That evening, I consumed two IPAs, one bottle of red wine, and finished with six shots of whiskey—all within five hours. The disappointment I felt in myself was overwhelming.
The Turning Point
The next morning, I told my husband I was done drinking and asked for his support. I plugged in my earbuds and began listening to quit-alcohol podcasts. I ordered “The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober” from Amazon.
Two months passed without alcohol, but I felt myself slipping back into familiar thought patterns: “Maybe just one won’t hurt.” Instead of giving in, I dove deeper into research, determined to find something that would help me avoid the trap of alcohol without requiring AA or rehab (while great options for many, they just didn’t resonate with me).
That’s when I discovered Annie Grace and her book “This Naked Mind: Control Alcohol.” Reading it felt like coming home—every page confirmed what my soul already knew: alcohol had no place in my life.
Life Beyond the Bottle
August 10, 2024, wasn’t just my last drink—it was the beginning of rediscovering who I am without alcohol. The journey isn’t always easy, but it’s real, authentic, and mine.
For anyone reading this who sees themselves in my story, know that you’re not alone. The path to sobriety isn’t linear, and there’s no single right way to walk it. What matters is finding what works for you and taking that first step toward the life you deserve to live.
Today marks another day of choosing clarity over chaos, presence over numbness, and authentic living over alcohol-induced existence. The journey continues.
I’m a mom to two amazing young adults and have been married to my husband for 28 years now—time really does fly! By day, my heart is at Mayo Clinic here in Arizona where I work as a nurse. On the weekends you’ll usually find me lacing up my hiking boots to explore the beautiful Arizona desert. Or visiting a historical museum or landmark. During the summer I’m curled up with a good book, or sneaking spoonfuls of ice cream straight from the container. Life is finally good again!
Yliana Hernandez
If this story resonated with you, and you’d like to read more from Yliana, or connect with her, you can find Yliana here, on Instagram!
Are you interested in sharing YOUR sobriety story with me and my readers? You can do this anonymously or with your name and/or bio. If you’d like to know more, leave me a message HERE and I will tell you all about it. Izzy
